Before you were "Mommy"

Being pregnant, I follow a forum on TheBump.com for May 2014 babies.  This forum shares our fears, joys, hilarious moments, and other nonsense.  Today, however, a link to a blog post was listed, and after reading it, I knew I had to share it.

Read Blog Here

There are several points made in this post that hit home, and after speaking with several other "mommies" out there, I feel that this might be reassuring to the emotions that everyone is facing. 

Please take the post in context.  Yes, it mentions keeping God at the center of your marriage, but even if you aren't a Christian, there is still some good that you might be able to get out of the read.

Allow me to highlight a few points that I felt really hit home for me:

"When we found out that we were pregnant with my son (now 4), my husband and I became one of those “new parent” couples. We researched together, shopped together and made every choice surrounding the arrival of our new baby together."

My husband and I have planned everything baby related together as a team.  We are both super excited about the new addition to our little family and can't wait for his arrival!  I think he had more fun registering for baby stuff than I did!

"To greater prepare ourselves for baby boy’s arrival, we even took one of those courses for new parents offered by the hospital."

We are signed up to take the 1 day class February 27th.

"If only our instructor had sat us down and said, 'Ladies, before you were Mommy, you were his. Men, before you were Daddy, you were hers. Remember this. Hold on to this. Keep these words precious to you.'"

Some tend to disagree with the "you were hers" and "you were his" due to ownership and independence, but I don't think that is what the writer is meaning.  She is simply trying to explain the importance of keeping the relationship centered and remember that the love and bond that you share is there, although things might not seem like it.

My husband and I are beginning to go through the emotional struggles already and it hurts.  But we have to remember to keep strong in our relationship and trust that things are going to work out for the best.  It isn't going to be easy, and adding a baby to the mix is going to throw a wrench in everything, but it is worth it (or so I'm told). 

I might hang her words somewhere visible to both of us to help through the tough times.  Despite the harsh words and the anger, at the end of the day I love my husband and he loves me just as much, if not more.  The only thing that can tear us apart is us, and the only thing that can keep us together is us.  I didn't understand what my family meant when they said that marriage is work, but I do now.

I hope this article brings you a sense of support and retrospect.  I may still be pregnant with our first child, but I plan on nipping it in the bud as soon as I begin to see signs of struggle.

24 Weeks!

It snowed!!!  What's even better, it snowed on my 24 week mark! 

So, I just HAD to take some pictures...RIGHT?!?!

Traditional profile pic

My failed attempt at a heart

Belly shot!

I kinda love this guy!

The Monday Blues

Hello everyone, and welcome to Monday!  The beginning of a long week for some, just another day for me.

My hubs started his first week of "real" work today!  He got hired at the Casino as a Cage Cashier and he is so excited.  He has been wanting to work there since he started college years ago and finally has his chance.  He will be on third shift, but started today at 4:00 to ease into the time difference (nice of them right?).  Which means, today and tomorrow I'm alone in the evenings until he gets home after midnight.

Normally, I love having time to myself, but after last night, I could use the company.

I know and understand that being pregnant comes with difficult health issues...but insomnia was not something I was prepared for.

I did not sleep last night.  Not one hour, not one minute.  By the time Jeremiah woke up this morning, I was 1/2 functioning and my chest hurt.  Not good.  He was able to get me to sleep around 10am, but it only lasted til 2:30.  The chest pain is mostly gone, but I still feel like crap.

Then comes Wal-Mart.  I went to get some groceries with my last two WIC vouchers, and almost broke down at the checkout because I was under the fruits/veggies by a couple dollars.  I was upset because I weighed and added, and I was supposed to be a few cents over.  NOPE!  Then the woman says, "It's only $1.20."

..........

I cracked..."It's another package of veggies that we can't afford!"  She then began to make excuses...a futile attempt to make me feel better, "Maybe something was on sale that you didn't see," "Maybe you added wrong," etc.  Didn't help.

There were people in line and I just said to finish the transaction.  I know what it's like to wait while people are running around grabbing extra stuff, so I didn't want to be THAT person...but it truly upset me.

I felt stupid.

I got home and was crying, and my Dad gave me a hug and told me that "It's OK," and that, "It wasn't stupid," which helped me feel somewhat better. Then I ate some of my carrots and we talked about me not sleeping and other stuff.

I'm restless...I am trying to find something to do that won't irritate me, the DOG is irritating me...I just want my husband to be here and hold me.

If tonight isn't any better, I'm calling my OB-GYN tomorrow...I don't know if I can take another day like this.